Thursday, 28 April 2016

Letter To The One I Claim To Love

A mighty pain to love it is,
And it’s a pain that pains to miss;
But of all pains, the greatest pain-
It is to love, but love in vain.
-Abraham Cowley
Remember all the promises made with laughter,
The best of times,
Remember once the things you told me and how the tears ran from your eyes,
I just hate to see you cry.
Sometimes I wished we could be strangers so I wouldn’t feel your pain,
You could have said “WE could have done a better job” but you said me?
You never mean for it to hurt, it just always does.
The longer I didn’t cry, the worse I thought it would be when I finally did.
So I held on, pushed through to see my breaking point,
Wanted to see the limit of my love for you,
My love, our love;
Unrequited love.
All the things you said with your mouth,
Your actions denied.
You go out, make others feel loved yet you ignore the one that loves you,
I loved you, I really did,
With my heart, my soul and most of all- my body.
You looked the other way,
All the lonely nights I needed your warmth,
You comforted someone else.
I fell in love with you and I had no idea,
Until I stopped loving you,
Only then did I realize-
All the while I claimed to love you I wasn’t really in love with you.
I am no angel; I didn’t say I was,
But I never hurt you, all I did was love a confused man.
And now I see the pain behind your smile again,
I wish we could be strangers so I wouldn’t feel your pain,
Because I am out of comfort to give you
I am out of love to give you,
I am out of anything to give you.
I have nothing for you!

Thursday, 21 April 2016

I’m Fine.

How are you?
I’m fine.
I guess that’s what you say when someone asks “how are u?”
That has become the norm, a routine, the accepted response,
But it shouldn’t be.
I just realized I’m a big liar and a good liar,
We all are.
We pretend we are ok and fine when we really aren’t,

Thursday, 14 April 2016

In My Loneliness

"don't love me if my solitude is sweeter than you"
I have learnt to love me
Love every part that eludes the eyes of man
From the scars inbetween my breasts that run so deep, it has imprints on my heart,
my heart that ached for you, that longed to get love in return,
To my thighs, that have been bruised by your constant need to satisfy the demons that dwell in you
My ears, so little yet patiently listen to all the lies you tell waiting to hear the truth
the real truth, cos with you, there are two different truths

In my loneliness,
I have learnt love is not all about pleasing you
my loneliness has shown me happiness,
In my loneliness, i found love, i found solace
Love that i never got from you

I am in love with my loneliness
For me to love you,
you have to love me with all the good, the bad, the scars, and all my short comings
For me to love you, you have to be sweeter than my loneliness...

In truth I have been working on this piece for a very long time... Like 2-3months and it is amazing how I needed just one line to close the writing and I woke this morning with fresh eyes and read through and I realised I was done with this writing a long time ago.
For me... It didn't need anything more, nothing extra, it is just perfect the way it is.... I hope you liked it.

Thursday, 19 November 2015

The Enchanted Dreamer

He was turning
And you could see him panting heavily,
He had a lot on his mind,
He was mentally troubled.
The brevity of life seemed to have dawned on him just now.
His heart was hovering,
He got in,